So the management thing is looking more promising to go through, apart from the internal hire/promotion freeze that goes into effect in Matt's company tomorrow. Which means he's getting the job, but in mid January, after we get back from Thanksgiving, and he burns through the rest of his vacation time, he gets to go on leave without pay and we get to tap our emergency fund for mortgage money. Thankfully we have an emergency fund. This does allow more time for other job possibilities to come to fruition, he was sort of being rushed into this gig because his supervisor wanted to keep him in the company. Still, sucks to be off the payroll just in time for Christmas, even if it does mean he gets a little extra unpaid vacation in the mix.
Me? I'm casting about to see what my option are/would be if I end up making a change. I keep thinking "grad school" then wanting to hide under something. What if I don't get accepted? What if I DO get accepted and crash and burn like the BSc that nearly-never-was? It's hard to imagine finding another position with all the good aspects that I have here, my job title often gets lumped in as a brainless wage-slave who gets handed the shitwork and the benchwork, but not permitted or expected to actively participate in the science. Most of this is probably the depression talking. Now that I know it's there, and that it does a lot of the talking, I'm more aware as it's happening. That doesn't seem to make it go away, I just get upset that I'm getting upset and off I go into a spiral. I'm sure the spiralling is fuelled by the double dose of uncertainty regarding our household income(s) right now. I just need to crowbar myself some breathing space to get a handle on some basic things that will help me get out of this vicious cycle and start making real progress towards stability.